Five stages you go through whe

Five stages you go through when you really, truly have nothing to wear

Woman all over the world have most likely experienced the feeling of having “nothing to wear”, even though their closet is stacked with clothes (even some with price tags).

Five stages you go through whe

Cameron Diaz reportedly said to also have this problem: “I’m like every other woman. A closet full of clothes. But nothing to wear. So I wear jeans.”

This experience even dates back to 1858 when William Allen Butler wrote a poem called “Nothing to wear”. In the poem, the fair Flora answers Moncher Harry when he asks her to the ball: “I should like above all things to go with you there, but really and truly – I have nothing to wear!”

This is proof that this has been a common struggle for centuries. Therefore, here are 5 stages woman go through when they don’t have anything to wear.

You go into full-blown Hulk mode


Your anger management issues are on the brink of erupting when you’ve tried on your 100th piece of clothing. You start off calm hoping to get the perfect outfit in five minutes, but after raging through your closet you are seriously starting to feel pissed off. Your neatly stacked closet has turned into a fire hazard zone with clothes lying everywhere now. Some curse words make their way when you start going into your next stage:

Completely despondent: All hope is lost


This is the stage where you start talking to yourself and try to keep back your tears. Little whispers of “keep yourself together!” will presumable pop up in your conversation. You’ll probably go and sit on your “no” pile of clothes and sip your wine while you are feeling very sorry for yourself. You don’t even want to borrow clothes from your friends because, really, what’s the point at this stage. You are going to be clothes-less forever.

You realise your wardrobe is empty and so last season


You ramble through your wardrobe and realise you’ve been wearing it all wrong. It’s all wrong ! You are utterly shocked that you have been out of style and now you’re thinking of going shopping tomorrow because of this nonsense. Up onto this point you thought you had options to choose from but now it’s just an empty closet full of lies.

You give up


At this stage you have decided to give up. You’ve been thinking about walking around naked for the rest of your life. You feel distraught but decide to continue to the next stage with the little pride you have left.

Finally choosing something ‘cause “you just don’t care anymore”


The final stage of dealing with the trauma of having nothing to wear concludes with an I-just-don’t-care-anymore attitude. The crisis has not been averted but you realise you’ll have to carry on. You finally dress in an outfit you’ve worn a million times, but who cares at this point. You think to yourself: its fine nobody will notice. But the voice inside your head is still screaming: “You look terrible!”

You come to the realisation that the whole process of having nothing to wear is kind-of ridiculous. You convince yourself to deal with this better in the future, but when tomorrow comes you find yourself going through the stages again.

It’s just a woman’s fate, I suppose.