Oscar Pistorius

Reeva Steenkamp’s father Barry has shared details of a meeting he had with Oscar Pistorius in June as part of the Victim Offender Dialogue.
Images via YouTube screenshot: M-Net/’My Name Is Reeva’

‘I didn’t say I forgive you’: Reeva’s dad details Pistorius meeting

‘He went on his knees and took my hand’: Reeva Steenkamp’s father is sharing details for the first time of his meeting with Oscar Pistorius.

Oscar Pistorius

Reeva Steenkamp’s father Barry has shared details of a meeting he had with Oscar Pistorius in June as part of the Victim Offender Dialogue.
Images via YouTube screenshot: M-Net/’My Name Is Reeva’

It was an emotional meeting between Oscar Pistorius and the father of the woman he murdered; Reeva Steenkamp.

According to Barry Steenkamp, there was not a dry eye in the room whilst he engaged with Pistorius as part of the Correctional Service’s Victim Offender Dialogue, back in June. 

The programme forms part of the rehabilitation of offenders who are being considered for parole. It seeks to offer closure for the victim’s family and a means for the offender to seek forgiveness. 

The elderly father of the slain model – who was shot and killed on Valentine’s Day in 2013 – shared his touching account in Thursday night’s final instalment of M-Net’s hard-hitting documentary My Name Is Reeva.

ALSO READ: Bombshell doccie: Did Pistorius text ex, brother ‘delete’ evidence?


For the first time, Reeva’s father Barry has shared details of his “difficult and traumatic” meeting with Pistorius. 

Whilst Barry agreed to meet the former Paralympian – currently serving a 13-year and five-month jail sentence – his wife June declined.

But the meeting at the Qheberha correctional facility did not live up to the standards that Reeva’s grieving dad expected.

He said in the doccie: “You arrive there thinking you’re going to say this and that, but it doesn’t work out that way. It’s just a sad, sad thing.

“I asked him certain questions…and I expected different answers. He gave me his truth, but I didn’t get my truth”.

ALSO READ: ‘Trustworthy, positive’: Why officials claim Pistorius deserves parole

Barry detailed a touching moment when Oscar Pistorius requested to shake his hand after the meeting.

He continued: “He came in, he went on his knees and he took my hand and shook it. He thanked me and [told me] how sorry he was and how he can’t stop thinking about that moment [Reeva’s death].

“It was a touching moment. I could’ve said no and left it but we did shake hands. I didn’t say I forgive you, I just said thank you”.

ALSO READ: Leigh Matthews’s dad on Oscar Pistorius parole: ‘The system is broken’


Accompanying Barry during the meeting was the Steenkamp family attorney Tania Koen.

She said of the experience: “The feeling in the room was an overwhelming sense of grief and sadness because, on the one hand, we had Barry, the father of Reeva who had to face his daughter’s killer. And on the other hand, Oscar was obviously sad, full of remorse and regret and also very tearful”.

However, she quickly added of Pistorius: “I don’t believe Oscar’s version, and I don’t believe he told Barry the truth”,


Whilst Barry ultimately agreed to let the “law take its course” on Oscar Pistorius’s parole petition, his wife June was not so forthcoming. 

Reading out a letter she wrote to Oscar, Reeva’s mother expressed her heartache of how her daughter would never marry, birth a child or complete her law degree. “You have stolen her life”, she added.

When asked if she believed if Pistorius was remorseful, June claimed: “If he’s destroyed by what he’s done now, that would be a good thing.

“I don’t know if that is the truth. There were so many lies during the court case that he may not have been really remorseful”.

And although she did not physically attend the Victim Offender Dialogue meeting, June still had a message for Pistorius. She said “I would say to him: ‘Give out the truth and you will be forgiven. God will support him if he tells the truth.

“He’s never going to be free until he does that”.

ALSO READ: ‘I don’t want to see him’: Reeva’s mom refused Oscar Pistorius parole meet


Meanwhile, Oscar Pistorius is currently fighting for his right to receive a parole hearing and ultimately get an early release.

According to calculations made by his legal team, they believe Pistorius became eligible for parole in February 2021. However, the Atteridge prison, where he spent the majority of his sentence, claims that Pistorius will only become eligible in March 2023.

Pistorius was convicted of culpable homicide in October 2014. This was later upgraded to murder in December 2015. He was handed a six-year prison sentence. However, the Supreme Court of Appeal increased his jail term to 13 years and five months following an unsuccessful appeal in November 2017.

According to News24, Pistorius’s legal team filed an order last month to force the chairperson of the parole board at Atteridgeville prison to “convene a parole hearing” for him “within 30 days following the granting of this order”.

Pistorius is also seeking that all documentation, including a social worker’s report, psychologist’s report, vocational report, unit manager’s report, and the case management committee’s report be made available for the hearing.

A parole hearing has yet to be scheduled.

ALSO READ: Reeva had ‘premonition’ at 14: ‘She knew she was going to die’