Taraji P Henson

Even celebrities like Taraji P Henson have found the pandemic hard to cope with psychologically. Image via Instagram @tarajiphenson

Taraji P Henson opens up about suicidal thoughts during pandemic

The ‘Empire’ actress has revealed she considered taking her own life during the lockdown.

Taraji P Henson

Even celebrities like Taraji P Henson have found the pandemic hard to cope with psychologically. Image via Instagram @tarajiphenson

Henson made the revelation during her series, Peace of Mind with Taraji, on 23 December. 

Similar to Cardi B’s Cardi Tries series, Peace of Mind with Taraji is a series on the Facebook Watch platform. In it, Henson interviews celebrities, experts and everyday people on mental health issues in the black community. The show is hosted alongside Henson’s best friend, Traci Jade Jenkins. 

‘Peace of Mind with Taraji’

The first episode of Peace of Mind with Taraji premiered on 14 December and focused on post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which Henson’s father experienced after his tour of duty in the Vietnam war. 

Actress Gabrielle Union joined Henson on the first episode and spoke about her PTSD, which stemmed from having been raped when she was 19. 

TARAJI’S SUICIDAL THOUGHTS

For part two of the second episode of Peace of Mind with Taraji, titled Is The Pressure to be a Strong Black Women Too Much, Henson was joined by psychologist Dr Lashonda Green and she then opened up about her suicidal thoughts. 

“I started having suicidal thoughts about ending it. It happened two nights in a row,” Henson said. 

She added she had a gun and had thought about using it. 

“I purchased a gun not so long ago and it’s in a safe, you know, and I started like, well, I could go in there right now and just end it all ’cause I want it to be over, but it’s in my head.

“I thought about my son, I said he’s grown, he’ll get over it, you know what I mean? I just didn’t care. I felt myself withdrawing. People were calling me, I wasn’t responding, I didn’t care.”

BREAKTHROUGH WAS OPENING UP TO A FRIEND

Taraji P Henson
Taraji P Henson in an emotional scene from the episode. Image: Facebook

Henson said she was first ashamed to open up about her suicidal thoughts, but once she did she was relieved and knew she was not going to go through with taking her own life. 

“Finally, I’m talking to one of my girlfriends and I knew I was smart enough to say it, because a part of me was ashamed. I was like, don’t want them to think I’m crazy; I don’t want them to, you know, obsess over me or think they gotta come and sit on me.”

“One day I just blurted it out to my girlfriend. She called me in the morning and I was like, you know I thought about killing myself. OMG I feel so much better, I’m not going to do it now,” Henson said. 

“I felt like if I don’t say it then it becomes a plan and what scared me was that I did it two nights in a row and the thoughts were like, I don’t want to be here, and I then I started thinking about going to get the gun. And that’s why, when I woke up the next morning, I blurted it out because I felt like after a while it’s going to take over me and it’s going to become a plan and that’s how strong my brain is,” she added. 

You can watch the episode here

TAMAR BRAXTON OPENS UP ABOUT HER SUICIDE ATTEMPT 

Henson was not the only celebrity to open up about mental health during the coronavirus pandemic. Azelia Banks spoke about depression earlier in 2020, and Braxton Family Values star Tamar Braxton joined Henson on part one of episode two of her show to discuss her suicide attempt. 

In July, Braxton was hospitalised after her fiance, David Adefeso, found her unresponsive in a hotel room. On Peace of Mind with Taraji, Braxton discussed the stress and family pressure that led up to her suicide attempt.  

Braxton shared an emotive post on Instagram with her four million followers regarding her feelings on life and her own mental health. 

Following the episode of Peace of Mind with Taraji, Braxton made another heartfelt post thanking the hosts.